So much is catching up with me emotionally these days. I want COVID to be over. I’m starting to feel trapped and angry. I really want to do some things that move me forward As a human being who lives with and for the sake of black lives knowing how much they matter. I can’t do much of what my heart wants to do until this is over. What’s happening around the election is genuinely disturbing to me. What is November going to bring?
Here is my reality:
I feel so many things I don’t want to feel, and those feelings are not going away anytime soon. Of course, these things upset me and they upset the people around me too. This is a hard season with lots of deep emotion for all of us. I know I need to accept that reality and keep using the phrases, Me too, You too, and Of course (from episodes 41-43). I know they help me stay more calm, clear and kind. I want that.
Another two-word -perspective-setter for me is so obvious that it’s easy to miss or even dismiss. Its what I want to talk about today.
I’m okay…
I don’t like the way I feel and I wish it would go away. Even more, I wish the things or people that are causing these feelings would just go away.
But still, I’m okay because…
…I’m alive and breathing.
As long as that’s true there is potential. It’s crazy how significant it is to stop for even 10 seconds and notice the rising and falling of my chest as I breathe or the air going in and out of my nostrils.
But still, I’m okay because…
…I know some things about feelings.
They are a sensation that is created in my body in response to life.they are temporary not only are they changing and unpredictable they don’t always reflect reality. When they do it’s just one piece of reality. Feelings are an ingrained way of responding to something. My favorite part is that they are not me. When they move on I will still be here.
But still, I’m okay, because…
…I have some very significant things that no one can take away from me.
I have resilience and inner strength; the ability to smile and care for the person in front of me. I can give and receive. I can pray and believe. I am creative and resourceful and I always get to choose how I respond to everything that comes my way.
When it comes right down to it, I know that I’m okay. Even now while I’m feeling feelings that I don’t like.
When I know that I’m okay I settle down. I can relax and just be in the moment without having to fix anything or blame anyone. I can sink into who I am and what I know is true about myself and my emotions. What I believe about God.
I remember inviting a friend of mine who was getting ready to support her 16-year old through labor and delivery to use these two words. She called afterward to tell me how much it stabilized and steadied her. I was so excited about what she experienced that I told my husband. His response was to jointly say, “wow, Judy so profound” I was unaffected by his sarcasm because I was so excited about the potential in this simple declaration.
Simple perspective shifts like this one where I go from being stressed about what’s going on to Being free to just be where I am are powerful. They free me to treat myself and the people as If We Matter…
I hope you will try it this week and let me know what you think.
Mentioned in this episode
- If We Matter
Resources
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